No condom, No Sex
| If One Partner Says: | The Other Partner Might Reply: |
|---|---|
| “Don’t you trust me?” | “It’s not a question of trust. A person can be infected with a sexually transmitted disease and not know it.” |
| “Come on, just this once.” | “No. Once is all it takes to become pregnant or to contract a disease.” |
| “I can’t believe you think I sleep around! You’ve really hurt my feelings.” | “I never said that. But I’d feel better if we used a condom.” |
| “I hate using condoms; it interrupts everything.” | “It doesn’t have to, if we have them on hand.” |
| “But I’m a virgin.” | “I’m not. Using condoms will protect us both.” |
| “I forgot to bring condoms with me.” | “I have some right here.” or “We can please each other without having intercourse.” |
| “It’s not as sensitive when I wear a condom.” | “Maybe you’ll last longer and the sex will be even better.” |
| “It’s such a turn-off to use a condom.” | “Not if I help you put it on . . .” |
| “But I love you!” | “I love you too. Protecting each other is what people in love do.” |
| “I’m not using a rubber, and that’s final.” | “Suit yourself. Either we have fun another way, or we don’t have sex at all.” |
| All-Time Favorites Barely Worthy of a Response: | All-Purpose Rejoinder: |
| “But I’m too big!” | “You know what they call couples who don’t use condoms?” |
| “But I’m sterile!” | “No, what?” |
| “Obviously you don’t care about me!” | “Parents.” |
| “If you get pregnant, I’ll help you care for the baby.” | And: “Patients at the STD clinic.” |
| Right. And the check is in the mail... |